See Tru Sauce

Point:

NOTES FOR SEE TRU SAUCE
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
Sawgrass Mills Cheesecake Factory
Server: (Carlos) Andres, from undetermined Latin country, with heavy accent.
Ordered:



GRILLED HAWAIIAN FISH "BURGER"
Fresh Grilled Fish, Island Slaw and Tartar Sauce on a Bun.
Served with Fries
With tartar sauce on the side, and with spinach instead of fries.
First, my usual champagne (Domaine Ste. Michelle). And the dark oat coated bread.
Fish sandwich arrives with sauce on both halves of buns – I make comment. Andres says he’ll get me tartar sauce (I say no, thanks). What’s on bun? He asks. Making a face, I say, mayonnaise and who knows what. Watching my cholesterol, I tell him. But it’s ok – I don’t send it back. (And of course I consume the sauce.) He says his father is slender, has high cholesterol. (But he, himself, is a bit pudgy.) Well, you like the champagne, he tells me. No fat, no cholesterol, I retort. But, he says, pointing to other half of bun, that’s not tartar sauce, that’s – proudly – “see tru sauce.” See tru sauce? I gasp. Yes, see tru sauce. I guess he can see through my fish to the sauce, I tell myself. Too embarrassed to ask him what he means, not wishing to break into Spanish, I peer under fish at what I gather is the island slaw. I taste it – it tastes a little lemony, a little… citrusy. So I guess that’s the see tru sauce. Andres visits me again, is concerned I haven’t eaten spinach. Too salty, I say. It’s supposed to be steamed. Once again, I say it’s ok. He must think I’m pretty fussy by now. When I get check, I notice he’s listed as “Carlos.” I ask him. Carlos Andres, he responds with a flourish. I observe him gallantly continuing to serve other patrons. Who else, I wonder, will order the see tru sauce? A little more fat and cholesterol won’t hurt me, I think to myself, as I treat myself to pumpkin and maple ice cream from Marble Slab Creamery. If I keep this up, no doctor will be able to see tru my sauce, and I’ll end up on a marble slab. Ouch.

Counterpoint:

According to Raffi Melkonian, Crescat Sententia, March 9, 2005:

Cheesecake Factory
Raffi Melkonian at 12:37 PM
These thoughts aren't original with me, but why do people like the Cheesecake Factory chain restaurant?
I was out with friends on Friday night, and we ended up there - the plain food was bad (French fries are not meant to be made in advance), the attempts at originality incredibly mediocre (I'm still not sure what was Hawaiian about the grilled fish sandwich, but it wasn't the freshness of the fish), the portions so large as to be completely indigestible, and the menu far too extensive to promise broad competence.
In my ideal world, CF would only get the few customers it could glean from the population of hungry but gluten intolerant people who - finding themselves too far from home or a better restaurant - couldn't make do with a loaf of bread from the local supermarket. In the real world, there's a two hour wait. Can someone, anyone, explain this to me? Two hours??
UPDATE: It turns out that the fish sandwich was topped with "island slaw". It just tasted like really bad but standard slaw to me, but what do I know?
UPDATE II: I should say that my question isn't rhetorical. That is to say, my attitude is not "why are all these people so stupid?" but "what am I, being stupid, missing?". Just to be clear. Also, Hei Lun Chan asks, in the comments, "Since they do have such a big menu, isn't it premature to dismiss the quality of their food based on one meal?". I have two responses. First, speaking for myself, this is a third meal there over two years, and I always taste everyone's dish, if they're willing. Second, you don't get to have a huge menu, serve crappy food, and then claim that if the customer had only chosen right, they would have liked their dinner. Everything on a menu should be good.

Counter-counterpoint:

At Cheescake Factory in Aventura on September 30, 2005, asked perky waitress about fish sandwich. It's been off the menu for about five months, she said.
See what happens when someone finally gave that fish sandwich some decent exposure?